On Monday morning, just as we set out for our daily walk, my mother told me the story of Noura Hussein: At 16, Noura was forcibly married off by her father. She refused, and in protest left her family home on the outskirts of Khartoum to stay with her aunt in Sinnar, a city almost …
Everyone is writing about you, prose and poetry passed around, read with avarice by all who knew you. Everyone is writing about you, an attempt to celebrate everything you are, a futile attempt to list all that you embody, to keep you alive. Maybe that’s why I can’t write about you. Because my mind cannot …
Aliaa’s alarm goes off. With a deep sigh, she gets up and makes her way to the bathroom, leaving the alarm still ringing. Eyes closed, she performs the obligatory 3 minutes of oral hygiene before heading to the kitchen to make her father his morning tea. Her movements are mechanical, as if on autopilot, because she is: set the …
It is Day 3 since Donald Trump was announced president elect of the United States. This is the first time I write this in such clear terms. The last two days, I have been struggling to even mention his name next to that title. It’s all been vague, hypothetical, vacuous. Before that, it was a …
On Eid morning, I watched Alton Sterling’s 15 year old son sob uncontrollably while his widowed mother spoke to the press. He is heard saying, “I want my daddy”. I learned that from the caption, because I couldn’t bear to watch the video with the sound on. That afternoon, I watched my 5 year old niece play while my parents were …
Yesterday afternoon, I overheard the following conversation between my mother and her friend: Friend: Hay ya Samiera, ma galu Muhammad Ali Clay raggadohu mustashfa [Oh, Samiera, they say Muhammad Ali Clay has been hospitalized] Mom: Ay walai kallamatni Sara, kur3alai [Yes, Sara told me, my goodness] That is the name by which he was known in …
I’m tired. Many of you reading this will probably assume that the title is in reference to Zoe Saldana’s portrayal of Nina Simone in the upcoming Hollywood film Nina. It saddens me to say that although very much applicable, no, that is not what I’m referring to here. The title, in fact, is the comment that …
She tilted her head to the left and scrunched her nose. “Do I know you?” I replied sheepishly. Yeah, I came here a while back… “Yeees, a long time ago! I remember you, come in!” I followed her inside, and took my place in the space where her hand guided me. I sat back, and …
I remember the first time I cursed. I was in sixth grade, on my way to a French test. Or maybe it was math, I’m not sure. Either way, I was walking down the hall to class with my friends, who were all abuzz with pre-test nerves, and in the din of the bustling hallway, …
Dear expat living in Sudan, Kindly refrain from speaking about Sudan if you’ve only been to one place in it (Khartoum). Kindly refrain from giving us your opinion on the country if you know virtually *nothing* about it. Kindly refrain from speaking on Sudanese life and issues if you have no Sudanese friends while living …
My father loves to make conversation with cab drivers. With anyone, really. He’s one-small-step-for-man away from being that guy on the plane who won’t let you sleep. I hold my breath every time we’re in an elevator, or in a waiting room, and especially in a taxicab. So you can imagine my surprise when my …
The bride and groom looked beautiful together. Head rested on head, they smiled into each other’s eyes, arms wrapped around the other’s neck in a grip that said, “there’s no one in the world but you, and without you there is no world”. “Albit di gabda feehu kadi lei, ma tatgal shwaya, aji? 3eib alyaaba” [why is …
Welcome to Sudanomena! The newest section of Blog #45, where we’ll be covering some of the phenomena that make Sudan, Sudan. (Get it? Get it?) Anyway, without further ado, let us begin. __________________ Mr. 3iddaman~ bring me kabaabi~ make them the shiniest that I’ve ever seen~ __________________ Seed Al3idda, or the 3idda Man, or the …
This post goes out to the Sudanese diaspora of North America. Whatuuuup! From the smallest misunderstandings to the most blatant and often insulting lies, “natives” have always speculated about the lives of their diaspora relatives, friends, acquaintances, and characters of hearsay. These, for many of us on the other side of the fence, range from …
I was 15 years old and on summer vacation 2 and a half months to revert back to innocence 2 and a half months to forget about drugs, sex, and issues of race 2 and a half months to run around 7eishan (courtyards) pile in beds having late night conversations with equally innocent friends “i …
As a child, I used to have this recurring fantasy where I had a diverse make-believe family filled with exciting relatives. Most of the roles were expendable and all the actors interchangeable, but two roles were always constant: Uncle, played by Robert DeNiro; and Grandma, played by Random White Lady. Random White Lady was an …
The topic has been brewing in my mind for quite some time, mainly because not a week goes by that I am not challenged by someone – be it relative or random person on the internet – on whether I qualify to speak on or claim Sudaneseness. The reasons for this seem to boil down … Continue reading
On Tuesday, the podcast Dukkan Show uploaded the interview that I’d been waiting for since I learned of Sudanese-American producer and rapper Amir Mohamed, a.k.a Oddisee. I discovered Oddisee in 2012, a few months after the release of his album, People Hear What They See. His work was a revelation, a blend of lyrical depth … Continue reading
If you’re part of the Sudanese Facebook world, then you probably already know what this is going to be about. For those of you who aren’t, or are fortunate enough to not have come across it, allow me to shed some light. This Facebook ‘community’ claims to be a space for Sudanese women who do … Continue reading
It’s been six months since I made the transition from my father’s daughter to his roommate. Well, I’m actually somewhere in the middle. Not quite daughter enough to get the clean version of the joke his buddy told him, but totally daughter enough to do his laundry. Being that my mother is in the States and it’s just … Continue reading
![Gag Order [Explicit]](https://alucan.files.wordpress.com/2015/11/tumblr_mh4qcuzler1qj80alo1_400.gif?w=290&h=225&crop=1 "Gag Order [Explicit]")
I’m tired I’m tired of writing rants I’m tired of being that chick I’m tired of having to verbally scalp every person I meet, but Bullshit levels are one the rise And much like Khartoum, despite my many years of experience, I am still unequipped for the flood Actually, ‘equipped’ is the wrong choice of … Continue reading
Yesterday, I came across this link on Twitter – a report on PRI on how the Sudanese-American community feels about the Ahmed Mohamed debacle. If you’re unfamiliar, Ahmed is a 14 year old Sudanese-American boy who was recently arrested after he brought a clock he built to school (after getting permission from his teacher) because his … Continue reading
Written sometime in 2013 _______________________________ The customer walks away, leaving the merchant counting his money. …Correction – HER money. HER hard earned money. She looks down at the bag, marveling at how oversized – and empty – it looks now that it has become her property. She strains to hear the sound coming from the bottom … Continue reading
Written sometime in 2014 _____________________________________ Hi, I’m Sara. I don’t believe we’ve met. Although… You look mad familiar And I’m sure I look real familiar to you too ‘Cause from the way you’ve been twisting, twirling, and tossing my name in your mouth I could’ve sworn we was like *this*, son! Nah, bruh, hold up, … Continue reading
This poem was written sometime in 2013, in response to a complaint from a young man who approached me after a poetry slam to tell me that he gave me a score of zero because I “should have written about more important things, like love” _______________________________________ Sugar lump, honey pie Do save me from my critical mind … Continue reading
Written sometime in 2012 _______________________ I could cry, but what good would it do It won’t bring you home sooner Won’t bridge the widening gap between us Won’t change the fact that time and time again You Insist on taking the car when you know full well that I have somewhere to go. I was really looking … Continue reading
Blog #45 